what have i done

And all I thought was that I wouldnt need a guy to hold on to. Then I find out how fun it is to hold onto someone. I find out how great it is to feel someone hold you tight and never let go. But moments like that dont come often when your alone. So I set out to find someone to hold on to. At first I thought that a nice sized guy would make me a happy, I tried that but somehow it never felt right. So I wanted someone smaller, that task was easy seeing as how thinner guys seem to be easier for me to get a hold of. At first everything was nice, in fact everything was great. Every time I found someone new it never felt right. I needed something more and so far every new guy couldnt love me. No guy could give me the mental challenge, the need to talk, they couldnt fill my heart. At that point I didnt care what he would look like just as long as I could be myself and he could be himself. Even if we had different views. I might of found that guy. The one guy that doesnt care if im a total nerd on the inside. I just need to know how to go up to a guy thats just like me in every way.

(I need to do the right things)