im no poet (3)

When I was sitting at my desk I was trapped in the amusement that girls are the only thing that I need and boobs are nice. Well one day I had looked up to find a really cute guy turned all the way around in his desk looking my way. So I knew that this guy was gay, but why would he be starring at me? Im nothing more then just some guy that he would cheat of off in math.

My entire first year of high school I was stuck wondering why this guy was staring back at me despite no action between us at all other then our eyes locking up in each others tractor beams. The next year we had only one class together but for the first half of the year he would still turn around to look at me.

I even gave up a chance when he asked if I wanted to smoke with him (yeah it was back then) I didnt say anything because up until then we never really talked. Later on in the year he moved to the other side of the room. I got stuck in walking in and out of that room to smoke and come back in to chill. I would also play my gameboy to pass the time when I had smoked all my weed.

Now we have this year, I cant help but think that I some how got him smoking because that all he talks about. I feel so bad because I had promised myself that I wouldnt influence anyone into doing drugs. So now im stuck without this amazingly cute guy talking about weed (total turn off for me now) and at the same time I dont know why he would even look my way.


(im so fucking tired but im afraid to go to sleep)